Over the course of life, you strive to become a happier person. You make career transitions, searching out workplaces that are more fulfilling. You study ways to accelerate personal growth. You go to great lengths to change your physical appearance, negative mind states, and unwanted habits.
Making these positive changes is great. However, it's interesting to note that most of these changes are rooted in a single desire - to live a happier life.
But what is it - happiness?
Is there everlasting happiness, or is it just a short moment of joy?
Of course, people have different goals and desires, and so things that they think will make them happy are also very different. While one would say that he would feel happy if he is financially independent and can afford everything he wants, another happiness is to be loved and valued, to have many friends and a healthy family, for a third - in the realization for his ideas, for the fourth - to be in a certain place or with a certain person, for the fifth he has the work that brings him satisfaction, etc., etc.,
In most cases, however, we say - "I will be happy if I will be totally happy when ..." That is, we are always in a state of seeking happiness. And it somehow constantly runs us off. Even when we do what we want, we feel happy for a short time and then we start the search again.
This makes some people define happiness as an unattainable chimera.
And what if we stop looking for it, and just ... see it?
There is a very good parable of happiness that I would like to share here with you-
What is happiness? Looking for happiness, we act just like the little kitten trying to reach its tail - we chase it, we run with all the strength behind it, we struggle and we can not catch it, and we do not realize it is actually always with us but we do not notice it.
In fact, not happiness is the chimera, but the idea of achieving, finding happiness.
As long as we hope to achieve it, by pursuing external motives, we will never be truly happy except in the short moments in which we have achieved the desired.
Maybe now you feel unhappy because you are not rich, you have not found the best job for yourself or because you live alone?
Many people are rich, but they are not happy, many of us are working desperately, but they feel emptiness and something is missing. On the other hand, there are many women and men living alone, yet they feel happy, complete and satisfied.
In people living in similar living conditions, some feel happy, others feel unhappy. Why?
Perhaps you think the reason is that people have different priorities?
The truth is that happiness is not so determined by the outside, but by our attitude.
Happiness is a state of mind, in which we feel the satisfaction of life and ourselves, we experience inner harmony and joy.
If we are in a state of discontent and we are used to complaining and denying the present moment, we will always feel unhappy whenever we go, how can we change our attitude of discontent towards gratitude?
As the saying goes - "Happiness is not an ultimate goal, but a way of traveling,"
happiness is not in achieving what we think will bring us happiness, but in the movement itself to the goal, the development, the movement, the change.
Man is happy really not when circumstances allow him, but when he feels happy, no matter the circumstances.
Because happiness is here and now, at this moment, it is in our attitude, in the state of our mind. It is not somewhere there or far in the time when we do something. It is here and now, inside us.
Happiness is a choice - we can find thousands of reasons to be happy and thousands to be unhappy. It depends on what we focus on.
Therefore, the first and most important condition to feel happy is:
Let yourself be happy.
Not tomorrow, not another day, but just NOW. Being happy now does not mean that you agree to stay at the level or place where you are. It does not mean you will not be looking for the better.
These days I saw a thought on James M. Barry:
"The secret of happiness is not to do what you like but to like what you do."
And I saw that some people accepted this thought as a call to resignation, such as abandoning dreams, even as a slave psyche.
On the contrary, when you accept the present moment as it is and you see the opportunity or the benefit in it when you find the good side of things, then you can change your life for good. Because change begins with a change of attitude.
Is my personal happiness more important than anything else?
Some people see happiness as pleasure or momentary joy. I do think happiness is important in life, but it all depends on what happiness means to you and how you approach it. True happiness is not defined by how much you smile or feel pleased, true happiness lies in being happy with your life as an overall. Accept that challenges, sadness, pain and failure are part of the journey, but recognize that they do not define who you are or what you can achieve.
We live in a society that is somewhat obsessed with the persuit of happiness. We are constantly bombarded with information of what will supposedly “make us happy” (money, sex, fame, power, etc). The problem is none of this things actually make us happy in the long term. It may work on a short term but ultimately it all comes back to how much you appreciate your life and yourself, what you have done for yourself.
Talk to yourself, all alone, ask what makes you unhappy or less happy now, why you failed to get happiness. Do not accept excuses or false answers. Continue the exercise, until the right answer comes. You will be amazed at the result and the changes coming over you.
Basically humans are selfish, whatever we are doing It's just because we need our own comfort or in other sense It's for our own happiness. Sometimes it is time to search for your own happiness.
So we can say Happiness is the most important thing.
We are leading a social life, making relationship, having food, winding a way to collect food… everything is for our own happiness.